

PEOPLE: UK TOUR Glasgow
Humanity. A bold experiment, a grand design, the so-called pinnacle of creation. On paper, flawless. In reality? A bin fire with opposable thumbs. Enter the Pirate King—ex-wrestler, biker, and Glaswegian antihero with a god-sized chip on his shoulder and a broken Pint glass of cynicism sharpened for the occasion.
This is not polite comedy. This is a full-scale audit of the human race—our stupidity, our vanities, our desperate need to invent things like TikTok and gender reveal parties. At the same time, we can’t even recycle properly. Gallows humour, filthy truths, blasphemous jabs, and the occasional philosophical gut punch—it’s all here, delivered with the dry, cutting voice of a man who’s seen too much and doesn’t give a toss about sparing your feelings.
People: great idea, poorly executed. Come witness the mess we’ve made of ourselves, bathe in the stupidity of your own species.
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